Learn More About Gottman Therapy



Gottman Therapy is an extensive approach to counselling couples that is based on research-based interventions and assessment of the relationship. It was developed by Dr John Gottman in the early 1980s. Couples who enter into the Gottman Method Couples Therapy can rejuvenate and revive their relationship. They can take these sessions inline as well.

Whether face to face or online, Gottman training begins with an assessment process. It helps inform the therapeutic framework and intervention. An initial session might include the following:

  • Assessment: It is commonly a joint session which is followed by individual interviews with both parties. Thereafter, couples complete questionnaires and then receive feedback on their relationship status from the therapist.
  • Therapeutic Framework: The therapist and couple decide on the duration and frequency of the therapy sessions.
  • Therapeutic Interventions: Interventions are specifically designed to help couples strengthen their bond and relationships. These interventions work in three primary areas: conflict management, building friendship, and the creation of the shared meaning of relationship. In these sessions, couples are taught to replace all the negative conflicts with some meaningful and positive conversations that will help repair their pasts. Therefore, the therapist designs these interventions to increase intimacy and closeness which in tend to deepen emotional connection, improve friendship, and create positive changes which enhance couple goals. Besides, therapies address relapse prevention.

Goals and Principles of the Gottman Method

The primary goal of the Gottman  private therapy is to disarm conflicting issues in a relationship to increase respect, intimacy, affection and communication. On the other hand, it helps remove barriers that usually creates a feeling of stagnancy in a relationship.

Furthermore, it helps in creating a heightened sense of understanding and empathy within the context of a relationship. Dr Gottman fairly developed nine primary components of a healthy relationship which are also known for the essentials of Sound Relationship House theory. These nine component are as follows:

  • Managing conflict.
  • Trust
  • Commitment
  • Sharing admiration and foundation.
  • Positive perspective
  • Building love maps
  • Turning towards each other
  • Making each other dreams come true
  • Creating shared meaning

 Who can get the benefit from Gottman therapy?

Dr Gottman has also written a book named “ The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” which is co-authored by Nan Silver. He quoted “Although you may feel your situation is unique, we have found that all marital conflicts fall into two categories: Either they can be resolved, or they are perpetual, which means they will be part of your lives forever, in some form or another.”

He further added that only 69% of conflicts between married couples are perpetual problems and those areas needed the full focus of the therapists. It can be performed by a fully Gottman trained therapist only.

This method of therapy can support couples across the world of all racial, economic, cultural and sexual orientation sectors. Many pieces of research have shown that Gottman Method Couples Therapy is quite effective for treating same-sex relationships also. Some of the relationship issues that may be addressed in therapy might include:

  • Perpetual conflict and arguments
  • Specific problems such as sexual difficulties, parenting, money, and infidelity.
  • Lacking communication
  • Emotionally distanced couples on the edge of separation.

According to a reputed and well-experienced therapist, couples with fewer and normal levels of conflict may benefit from this Gottman Method Couples Therapy. Trained and experienced therapists in the Gottman Method can help couples to build stronger relationships and teach them healthier ways to cope with problems as they arise in the future.

These sessions are taken by trained therapists only at their place and under some special circumstances, you can also enroll in online Gottman training.